Dancing Octopus?

Let me preface this post by saying that I do not believe this happens in most countries. I'm fairly positive this is a very rare thing and mostly found in Asian countries. That being said, please continue to eat NORMAL sushi. It's delish and unoffensive. And not very cute. Pretty, but not cute.

THIS, however...

Now, from what the description says, this poor poor creature is already dead. But why in God's name would you want to do anything to make it mimic life again? Has anyone else see "A Christmas Story" where the Christmas duck comes out with his head and the mother screams? The duck was not moving, quacking, and it was absolutely not dancing. And yet she finds it disturbing. Given this knowledge about the human brain and its interworkings, whyyyy oh whyyy would a chef put this on the menu? Now if the octopus was alive and swimming around in a tank with Nemo, I'd think it was adorable and I'd be popping some popcorn to enjoy the show. But never would I ever think - "Man, I'd really love to chop him up and eat him now! While looking into his eyes AKA SOUL!"* My conclusion - I cannot go to Asia. Not with things like this lurking around the corner. I will stick to Taco Bell. Yes, it's horrible for you, and probably gets an F with the health department a shocking amount of time, but nothing has a face in that beautiful restaurant. Nothing. Perfection.

*And yes, I believe all cute animals have souls. Bugs and bats not included, no matter how cute you might think they are. They are purely functional on this earth as far as I'm concerned. And no, I do not need convincing of otherwise.

Almond Butter / Dieting

Oh. My. God.

Almond butter is by far one of the best/worst inventions. Why?

Pros:

• Nice clean taste



• Healthy



• Easy in theory

Cons:

• You have to stir this ish every day



• If you don't stir it, it takes a good 15 minutes and a microwave to undo the damage



• The texture makes me gag a little (instadrymouth)

I've also decided that if it weren't for tastebuds, I would love to be vegan. One of my friends didn't realize this included ALL animal products so that means no baked goods and pretty much nothing tasty. No cheese? Impossible. No ICE CREAM? I think I'd rather be chubs.

But, let's give it a fair chance. So far today I've had chocolate milk and this ridiculous almond butter. I've set myself up to do okay in the vegetarian world. Maybe tomorrow I'll do vegan... This is going to take some planning. I'll post the results.

On a side note, I'm still gaggish from this almond butter.